amusing grace

My face is stuck in a book

Need. . . .help. . . No time. . .to post. . . Addicted to. . .facebook. . .

I wish. . .

-That veggies would immediately start tasting so good to my 4-year-old -- that we would have to make him stop eating so many.

-That I could immediately fast-forward the “media election coverage” parts of my life.

-That powdered donuts would suddenly and magically become low-fat and chock-full o’ vitamins and minerals.

-That innovators would invent a small portion of bathroom tile directly behind the commode that was self-cleaning.  Because as it is, to clean this area, there is no other option -- you MUST hug the bowl.

-That I could bottle and give away to others the feeling that I get when my sons laugh so hard that it doesn’t make a sound..

-That there truly was some way to “taste the rainbow.”  (I’m imagining sort of an orange-sherbet flavor myself)

-That there were more words that rhyme with “orange” (and “sherbet”, too, for that matter).

(For the seven people who still read this blog -- feel free to post your own wishes in the comments section:-)

Powdered donut nutrition facts

Ironic, isn't it?

This morning, once again, my 4-year-old son asked for fudge-striped cookies for breakfast.  Being a responsible parent, I of course said no.  I then proceeded to fix him a bowl of kids’ cereal that I’m pretty certain has the same (or less) nutritional merit as the cookies.

A brief explanation. . .

It’s not that I haven’t been blogging.  I just haven’t been blogging here.  I’ve been spending more time lately at the blog I maintain for my place of employment.

So after you roll your eyes at my lack of posts here, please feel free to check out “Rock Around the Blog.”

John Piper's thoughts on the prosperity gospel

Stop the madness

I live in Texas.  Today I saw a dog wearing a cowboy hat.

I just wanted to share that.

The Cowboy Dog by Nigel Cox

On a very serious note. . .

The town where I grew up (Jackson, Tennessee)

was devastated last night by tornadoes. I especially wanted to ask prayer for my alma mater, Union University. My old campus is basically in shambles. Not to sensationalize the damage, but to give you an idea of the scale of what I'm talking about:

-- All but one of the seventeen buildings on campus were damaged in some way.
-- Of the 1,200 or so cars on campus when the tornado hit, only about 100 were undamaged.
-- 40% of the dorm buildings were totally destroyed.  40% were heavily damaged, and only 20% are livable.

This is info I’ve gathered from the internet, and I’ve not been there to see the damage firsthand.  But judging from the photos I’ve seen -- the above stats seem accurate.

Miraculously, there were no fatalities on campus. But you can imagine the emotional healing that needs to take place from such a massive disaster; not to mention the huge undertaking of rebuilding the campus.

My college may not be one you guys have heard of, but it was academically and spiritually VERY special to me during my formative years.

Please be in prayer for the staff, faculty, and student body of Union University during this difficult time and during the long road that lies ahead.

If you are interested in learning more or giving to the disaster relief fund that has been set up, you can get updated info at Union's website:  www.uu.edu.

Blah, blah, blog. . .

In the category of “blatant self-promotion”. . . I’ve recently become the blog-master (may I officially coin that term, right now?) of a new blog for the theater where I work.  So here are your very detailed instructions (in order):  1) peruse the fascinating new site cleverly entitled “Rock Around the Blog.”  2) enjoy the aforementioned blog for several moments and then marvel at how it has absolutely changed your life  3)come back to this post and leave an encouraging comment for the ever-insecure blog-master.

Thanks:-)

"Battle of the Advertising Mascots" -- Round 1

                               

Ronald McDonald vs. The Burger King.

Ronald McDonald’s special skills – 1.creeping out children  2.calling upon Grimace, gelatinous friend, to sit on opponent  3.summoning the “Fry Guys” to annoy opponent to death

The Burger King’s special skills – 1. REALLY creeping out children  2.“pointy crown of doom”  3.distract opponent with his puffy pants

Outcome – Although the Burger King packs a whopper of a punch, everyone knows that McDonald’s is better.  Just one more mascot that “got served” by Ronald.

Wikipedia entry for “Ronald McDonald”

And now for something completely different. . .

Everyone has a dream.  At some point in my life, I want to throw a head of lettuce as hard as I can through the strings of a harp -- and then eat the salad that ensues.

Perhaps I should dream a little bigger, huh?

Anyone else have a random, less-than-noble goal in life?  A completely pointless personal indulgence?  Or am I alone in my weirdness?

I think I know the answer to that last question.

The California Lettuce Research Board